Several months ago, I had a doctor’s appointment. Usually, I try to get the first appointment of the morning so that I won’t have to leave work in the middle of the day, and because I can see the doctor immediately, before he gets delayed. This time, however, my appointment was at 11 because I’d been rescheduled. By the time I made it to the exam room, it was 12:15. I’d read every magazine in the office, including Golf Digest, and Field & Stream. I was contemplating curling up on the exam table and taking a nap, when I overheard the following from the next exam room:
Dr: What did you have for breakfast today?
Patient: A granola bar and a banana.
Dr: Well, that’s twice what you actually needed, that’s ridiculous.
Patient: I thought it was a good breakfast.
Dr: Obviously, no.
Patient: But bananas have lots of potassium, and the last time I was here, you said that my potassium was low.
Dr: First of all, if I thought you needed potassium, I would have prescribed some for you. Secondly, bananas don’t have a lot of potassium. That’s just what the banana lobby wants you to believe.
This is the point where I almost burst out laughing, except that I figured, if I could hear them, they could hear me.
Luckily for me, he’d spent so much time berating the poor banana eater next door, he didn’t have the time to ask what I’d had for breakfast, and I made it out unscathed. (Before you ask – no, I can’t go to a different doctor, because he’s a specialist, and the only one in a 100 mile radius. And no, I’m not kidding.)
Who knew that the banana lobby had such power to influence the breakfast menus of people across the country? Who even knew that there was a banana lobby?? Also, try saying “banana lobby” out loud. It’s kinda fun.
Now that I think about it, there must also be a Cheddar Chex Mix lobby. It’s the only way I can explain the constant presence of the Chex Mix bag in my pantry….